It's A Family Affair

As you'll note from my last post, I have been pretty worried that our wedding was going to become some sort of freak show with Matt and me at center stage. This concern grew when I found an assortment of old photos of me on my mom's kitchen counter that were certainly destined to be viewed by many. And I morphed into a kind of Cranky McAngrypants when I noted a picture in particular in which I had just had jaw surgery the month before--and to add insult to injury, had cut my own bangs. My suspicions were confirmed. Doom was imminent and I grouchily admonished the involved parties who I perceived as turning our wedding into some kind of sideshow and corporate endorsement of m & m's, simply because we had most unwisely chosen that theme for our web page.

Despite my apparent continued conviction that this is still the case--I have softened. Truly. I really don't like being a crank, well, perhaps I do sometimes, but I don't think there are many that hope their wedding bears close resemblence to the state fair. I discussed this with friends who have gotten married and they also noted that everyone wants input. People I bearly know suggest cotton candy machine rentals, hay rides, or in the case of Martha Stewart--individual rose petals for every sugar cube for every cup of coffee you serve. There comes a point when the people actually spending a lot of time taking care of details would rather be watching a rental movie and must firmly and kindly urge everyone to step off. And yet, after a much-needed nap, some quiet time reading and a discussion with Matt, I am finally realizing that a wedding is unlike any other event--and not just because it has its very own price scale. (eep!) No, a wedding is a community event. It's a family affair with two families celebrating their union and the new family formed by two people they have watched closely and guarded so preciously for years. They feel involved because they ARE involved.

No, there will still not be hay rides and I will still not take kindly to oddly insistent suggestions about hiring fireeaters or charging admission (?) from strangers. But, I am going to make room for compromise and for the kind and loving acts of both our families-- even if I necessarily writhe when my mom flashes the finer moments from my exceptionally awkward adolescence (and hopefully Matt's, too) in some kind of laser light show. In fact, I will welcome it. I will have another piece of cake and pat myself on the back for being such a decent sport. However, I must revisit the idea that there wouldn't be anything TOO terrible about eloping. Ha ha.


See, Mary J. Blige knows what's up. What took me so long?

Wish you were here,
Wed Dog